Vagina Monologues

February 20, 2005

I had no idea I would revisit Valentine’s Day this soon until I read two eye-opening FrontPageMagazine.com articles: Jon Sanders’ “The Feminist War on Valentine’s Day”,  and Jason Mattera’s “The Hijacking of Valentine’s Day”.  After reading those articles, it seems romance may be dead.  If it isn’t, “V-Day” could kill it.

Apparently, Valentine’s Day has become “V-Day”.  This is a marketing campaign begun by Eve Ensler, the creator of “The Vagina Monologues”.  It is “an organized response against violence towards women”.  Anti-violence actions include presenting “The Vagina Monologues”, donating money to V-Day and buying merchandise such as “Rape Free Zone” items, “Vagina Warrior” t-shirts and “Period Party” bags.

To be fair, V-Day has given money to fight rape and domestic violence in the US and to fight female genital mutilation, honor killings, bride burnings and sexual slavery internationally.  I agree that abuse of women should be stopped, but isn’t there a more tasteful way to do so?  Also, why choose Valentine’s Day?  Traditionally, it is a day to symbolize love and tenderness, not crimes against persons.  Wouldn’t National Night Out Against Crime be a better date for an anti-violence campaign?  Shouldn’t we campaign against all violence?   It seems like a general anti-crime campaign might be preferable to separate ones for each victim group.  As for the “Rape Free Zone” shirts, shouldn’t every place be rape free and crime free?

Why not let Valentine’s Day continue to be a time for couples to celebrate love and commitment?  Before I read those articles, I thought it was a day to spend time with the man in my life, (if I have one), cook his favorite meal for him and exchange cards and/or gifts.  Little did I know it has become a day for discussing violence and vaginas with other women.  What happened to some holidays simply for fun? (This happened with Halloween, too – it has become a day for religious extremists to cry “Satanism” and for liberals to ban politically incorrect costumes.)

“The Vagina Monologues” includes a skit that favorably depicts the statutory rape of a 13 year old girl by an adult woman as “teaching” the girl to “pleasure herself”.  Positive portrayal of rape as part of a “V-Day” campaign against violence toward women!  Would “The Vagina Monologues” devotees feel the same way about the scene if it showed an adult male “teaching” a young teen to “pleasure herself”?  Feminists would probably protest if such a scene with a male actor were included.  Why should it be different when the child molester is female?  In a real life situation, the young victim would be just as damaged regardless of the abuser’s gender.  Young boys who were molested by men frequently have psychological problems resulting from the abuse.  Why should it be different in a woman-girl situation?

“The Vagina Monologues” contains material about vaginas, menstrual cycles, masturbation and viewing the “C” word as a good name to call a woman.  This sounds fun – will it be followed by the “Hemorrhoid Harangues”?  What happened to discretion in our society?  Some people believe that all things should be publicly discussed simply because they exist.  Private topics used to be spoken about between close friends and relatives.  That wasn’t denying the existence of those things.  It was acknowledging them in the appropriate circumstances.  Lately, many people mistake private for shameful.  Bodily functions such as menstruation and elimination are normal and natural, but aren’t great subjects for conversation.  That does not make those functions “shameful”.  Everyone eliminates, but would “Pooping Party” merchandise be in the best of taste?

I am not saying the play should be banned – only that it has limited appeal.  “Monologues” doesn’t seem to be in the Valentine’s Day spirit.  On a day dedicated to couples, dialogue seems more suitable.  The play’s content seems centered on the self instead of on others. A play dealing with community spirit seems more appropriate for an anti-violence program than an exercise in narcissism.

Jason Mattera’s article contained the following quote from the director of a women’s center:  “The vagina is our center.  Everything that a woman has is in her vagina – physically, spiritually, intellectually, it’s all in the vagina.”  That woman certainly doesn’t speak for me!  As a woman, I am offended to be reduced to a body part, but if I had to choose an organ that is my “essence”, it would be my brain.  I would hate to think my spirituality and intellect is “all in the vagina”.  Someone fitting that description sounds more like a bitch in heat than a human female.  I have news for “The Vagina Monologues” fans: My vagina is not my identity and, if any of them calls me a “c***” to my face, that is still a fighting word.

Eva Ellsworth